Are you considering a prenup? If you are about to be married and you have: a business, profession, home, are a high-income earner,may be receiving a large inheritance, or have significant retirement savings, you should.
Is one of the reasons you are reluctant to broach the subject with your intended is because it seems so unromantic? Are you adverse to suggesting seeing an attorney while you are planning a wedding and tasting wedding cakes? Well if so, you should consider a collaborative prenup.
In a collaborative prenup both you and your intended spouse will have a collaboratively trained attorney. Collaboratively trained attorneys are trained in conflict resolution, attentive listening, and creative problem-solving. We realize this is your marriage and relationship, therefore we will listen. We will advocate for you and advise you what the law is and what will make a good binding agreement, but the content of the agreement is your decision. The idea is not you against him or her, but instead all of us working together. Collaborative attorneys do not agitate or work at cross purposes. We work together. We will honor your relationship, bring forth your expectations and concerns, foster a sense of trust and security. Transparency, honesty, integrity and dignity – these are the qualities we espouse in a collaborative process and these are also the qualities of a good marriage.
We can address the legal ramifications of a divorce as well as its aftermath. If a divorce happens you will have an agreement. In this way neither one of you will be devastated financially or have to incur exorbitant costs for attorneys. Your money should be used for any children you may have as well as have the funds to set the both of you up for the next chapter of your life.
Your relationship and each one of you are unique. Your finances, talents and histories will be considered and discussed so an agreement will be tailored to fit your particular situation. You will be listened to and encouraged. There is no cookie-cutter prenup agreement. Anyone who tells you so is very misinformed.
By using the collaborative process not only will you obtain a fair, well-written and unique agreement you will leave the process with a better understanding of your relationship, have better communication skills, and hopefully be able to make a true commitment. You will gain insight and clarity about your relationship and upcoming marriage. It can be an antidote for the wedding jitters and will foster respect and true intimacy between you and your future spouse. What is more romantic than that?
